


Forever United

by Seldenta



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-24
Updated: 2014-07-24
Packaged: 2018-02-10 06:13:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2014143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seldenta/pseuds/Seldenta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raised in the life of hunting. Sam and dean have only ever had each other. Will their love be enough, to survive their lives challenges? Sam/Dean Slash, Wincest. M for future chapters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Your Own Personal Hell

Another day in some dingy hotel room on the way to another hunt on the opposite coast. Sam was curled up in his bed, the covers thrown across his lower half and arms wrapped around one of his pillows. Dean was in a similar position in his own bed, though arms were behind his head, eyes opened and staring at the ceiling.

Listening to his baby brothers breathing and just enjoying the peace and quiet. He was of course fighting the urge to look over at his sleeping brother, to allow his eyes to roam over his well toned chest and stomach, lingering on where the blanket was settled. No he couldn't let that happen because these feelings weren't right. Sammy was his brother for christ sake! With a heavy grunt he rolled onto his side before throwing his feet over the side of the bed. Reaching down he yanked the sheet off his lap and headed towards the bathroom. Only casting a glance to see if he'd disturbed his brother. Shutting the door behind him and locking it before bracing himself against the sink.

Glancing up he stared into the mirror, looking at his reflection for what seemed to be hours but was only a few minutes before quickly turning on the tap, shoving his hands into the stream of water and splashing it over his face. How could he feel like this about Sammy? He was suppose to protect him, to keep him safe. Not be thinking about molesting him, or worse. A shudder rolled down his spine and he took a deep breath. The muffled sound of his brothers voice caused him to jump, spinning towards the door. "What was that sammy? "I said are you alright?" "Yea i'll uh... i'll be out in a second." "Alright..." Of course Sam didn't sound convinced about him being alright. Go figure.

Shaking his head he turned off the tap and grabbed a towel, drying his face before yanking the door open and striding towards his bag. "You alright Dean?" He glanced towards his brother and frowned, reaching into the bag and yanking out jeans, a shirt and new boxers. "Yea why wouldn't I be?" He mumbled, turning back to the bag. When Sam spoke next he was standing right behind Dean, and his hand reached out to touch his brothers shoulder. "Cause you seem tense. I know somethings wrong, talk to me dean." Dean jumped at the contact and whipped around, effectively pulling away from his brother who frowned at this.

Dean knew his brother wasn't going to drop it unless he either spilled, or they got into a huge fight. Taking a deep breath he braced himself for the argument that was sure to come. "I said im fine, Sam. Leave it alone." His tone was short and cold. Sam flinched slightly at the sudden change of attitude and his frown grew "Why do you always have to be such a jerk? I am just worried about you Dean. But if you want to bottle it up until it is driving you insane, eating away at you then -" "YES! If there was something wrong that is exactly what I want. Now stop being a bitch and get ready, we have a job to do!" Dean then turned and strode into the kitchen, donned in only his jeans that he'd pulled on along with his fresh boxers sometime during their spat. Hey it wasn't like they hadn't changed in front of each other before.

"Dean..." He paused mid step at his brothers tone. It was his hurt, pleading tone that always got him his way. Yet another deep breath was taken as he rounded on his brother. "What Sam?" Which was a mistake considering Sam was standing close to him again, a hurt expression on his face. Dean had to force himself to plaster on a glare, posture forced to seem impatient. "Well?" "Nevermind i'll... i'll meet you outside when your ready...maybe even get breakfast?" "Sure whatever." Sam nodded and turned, it was only then that Dean noticed he was dressed. Wow that kid dressed fast. "Sammy?" "Yes?" Came the reply from his brother, who was standing in the door. "Im..." Sam raised an eye brow at him and he sighed. "Get me 3 sausage biscuits?" He grinned at his brother who snorted and walked out the door, grumbling something about all the meat dean ate and heart attacks.

Dean couldn't help but smirk at that, leave it to sam to worry about his health even when he was annoyed at him. It just reinforced the fact that they loved each other all the more, granted he doubted that Sam loved him the way he did, in that unnatural, so going to hell if I ever acted on it, sort of love. At least he hoped his brother didn't, for the most part anyways. A small part in the back of his brain, the sick and twisted part that wanted to do disturbing things to his brother, well it wished he did love him back; like that. A sigh escaped his lips and he turned, heading towards the door and grabbing his shirt, pulling it over his head as he stepped out into the cool morning air. They had to get going, there was a haunting to get to. Oh the joys, right? Pulling the door shut he turned and caught sight of Sammy leaning against the impala. "I already checked out, so we can get going." A dumb nod was issued and he fished his keys from his pocket, and was about to move around the impala to the drivers side.

That was until a hand clamped over his arm and gripped tightly, stopping him in his path. Looking down at the hand he sighed and looked up at Sam "What?" "I know you said your fine...but if you wanna talk...whenever, i'll listen." This of course caused his heart to clench. He'd been being an ass to his brother and all sam was, was well nice. "Yea, alright." He mumbled in response and Sam let go of him a few moments later. "I got breakfast." His grin stretched over his face and Dean couldn't help but smirk. "Great!" Moving around the hood he opened the drivers door and slid in, followed by Sam who slid into the passenger seat. As dean started the engine his brother fished out their breakfasts, handing Dean a sausage biscuit; already unwrapped. "Thanks."

Dean smiled at Sam before heading off down the road, taking a bite of the biscuit every few minutes. It was little things like that, that made it seem tolerable to fight off his disgusting desires. Of course there were times when it seemed like Sam had them as well. Like when his hand would linger to long, or Dean would catch him staring at him while he drove. Of course he rarely ever said anything, just smirked and looked back at the road.

Then again there were times when his feelings, the unnatural feelings that he got, were his own personal hell. Like when they were stuck in a small motel room and Sam decided to walk around shirtless. He swore, that boy knew about the desires and loved taunting him. A sigh escaped vocals and he shook his head, trying to rid his mind of those thoughts, taking yet another bite of the biscuit. Of course that had been the last bite of that one, and before he could ask for another it was already held out to him, unwrapped and Sam had a small smile on his face. Dean smirked "You psychic man?" "No I just...know you" "Uh huh." God how he hoped that statement wasn't true. Of course he knew that he could read Sam with ease, knew when something was bothering him and usually could tell what it was. Of course he'd been the one to raise Sam, watching out for him and protecting him all their lives. Could Sam really read him just as well?

They fell into a comfortable silence, only stopping once or twice to use the rest room and grab something to eat. Of course when the sun set, they pulled over to switch places. Sam got in the drivers seat and Dean leaned up against the passenger side door to take a nap. "Wake me when its my turn to drive." He mumbled against the rolled up shirt he was using as a pillow. Sam had been taking naps all day. They often did this, to arrive at hunts sooner rather then later. Sam glanced at Dean and nodded "Of course." He put the car in drive and pulled back onto the road. Glancing at the sleeping figure of his big brother every few moments. It was bugging him, not knowing what was causing Dean to be so upset. They often got into fights, and he was used to Dean not wanting to talk about his feelings, but this seemed to be really upsetting him. Hell, he loved his big brother more then anything in the world, he would do anything just to see him happy. Of course it didn't help that he felt some very wrong type of love for his brother, the type that made him want to just reach over, grab dean and kiss him to death. A sigh escaped vocals as he ripped his eyes from the sight of his brother, focusing back on the road. Sometimes he swore that he was living in his own personal hell.


	2. Do you feel it

It was two days later that they pulled into the small town where their job was. Dean was driving, of course and it looked like he was about to pass out. "Sammy..." Sam, who had been leaning against the passenger door watching the trees go by looked over. He'd woken from his nap about an hour ago and had insisted on driving, only to be told no by Dean. "Yea?" He knew Dean was exhausted, and hoped they wouldn't start the job until the next day. Considering Dean was about to pass out where he sat. "When I get to the motel go check us in. Im thinking the job can wait till tomorrow, yea? Less you wanna do some research today?" Sam smirked and nodded "You rest Dean, I'll do research and tomorrow you can start helping. No biggie." Dean nodded, pulling into a parking space near the motel and opened his door. Sam got out as well and walked to the office, checking them in and headed back out to see Dean leaning heavily against the impalas hood. "Come on, lets get you to bed." He wrapped his arm around his brothers waist and half carried him to the room. Of course, dean was protesting the whole way, but was to exhausted to really yank away from the warmth without falling on his face.

Yea that'd be just great, right? Be an ass to his brother when he was just trying to help and probably end up hurting himself. Thus was the reason he just grumbled under his breath after the first few smacks at Sam when he first put his arm around him. It wasn't on his to do list to do a face plant on the ground this evening. Sam managed to get the door open and helped Dean to the bed, who flopped face down on the mattress and grumbled when Sam removed his shoes, lifted his feet and pulled the cover out from under him then proceeded to cover him. Sam smirked at his brothers half sleepness and after covering him hovered by the bed for a few minutes before leaning over and brushing a kiss to his forehead, when he was certain dean was asleep of course. He then turned and walked over to the poor excuse for a table and sat down, pulling his laptop out of its bag and opening it.

Dean had been awake when Sam brushed the kiss upon his forehead and he laid there, feigning sleep as his mind whirled. Sure it could have just been a brotherly thing, god knows he'd done it enough when Sam was younger and he'd tuck him into bed. Then again he had always been the older one, the protector and caretaker. It had been his job to take care of Sam, hell it still was. With a soft sigh he rolled onto his stomach and buried his face into the pillow. Soon drifting off to sleep, thinking about what that simple kiss could have meant. It had been a few hours of researching, and so far Sam'd only found out the ghosts name and how she was killed. There was nothing on where she was buried. A heavy sigh escaped his vocals and he leaned back in the chair, reaching up to run his hand through his hair.

Dean had been awake for a few minutes, watching Sam as he was immersed in his research. However at the sigh and obvious signs that Sam was stressed he pulled himself out of the comfortable bed. Walking as silently as possible over to his brother and placing both of his hands on Sams shoulders, giving him a sort of massage for a few seconds before brushing it off as him just goofing around when he gently shook his brother forward and back, then side to side. Sam had nearly lept out of his skin when Deans hands were placed on his shoulders, and his mind began to whirl at the massage, that was odd. But then he was shaken and a choked laugh escaped him. "See your finally awake." "Yea, so what'd ya find out so far?" Dean was leaning over his shoulder, reading from the screen. Sam smirked and leaned back more, his head resting against Deans chest/stomach and with each breath he in hailed his brothers scent, a mixture of gun powder, oil, soap and just Dean. "It appears that Samantha Henderson was brutally murdered by her step father in 1956. I can't find where the body is though..."

Dean simply blinked when Sam moved back to rest his head against his chest. Again with the odd things that they both did but shrugged it off, listening to his brother say what all he'd found. "Hm.. Well we'll ask around town then, eh?" Standing up he squeezed Sams shoulders before turning and heading to the bathroom. Sam turned his head slightly to watch Dean head off to the bathroom before sighing again and scrubbing his hands over his face. Leaning forward letting his elbows rest on the table. God this was going to be a long day. A few minutes later Dean reemerged from the bathroom dressed and ready to go. "Come on Sammy." "Alright, lets go." Sam got up from the chair and headed towards the door as Dean pulled on his leather jacket and snagged the keys to the Impala off the night stand. Once outside they made they way to the car and got in. Dean reached over and cranked up AC/DC, Back in black(AN: I couldn't resist, I was watching clips from bloodlust xD) and pulled out of the parking lot.

It was about ten minutes later when they pulled into the motel where the home owners were currently staying. Dean and Sam shared a look before they got out and were approached by Tom, the home owner of course. "Anything?" "Well Sammy here found out who the ghost might be, but we can't find out where her body is." "Who?" They paused as a person walked past. "Samantha Henderson" "Samantha Henderson?..." The man paused for a minute, thinking about it before a look crossed his face. "Shes buried on the private graveyard out back behind the house about an acre back." Dean and Sam nodded "Grave marked?" The man nodded "Thanks." "No problem, and uh thanks." "Don't thank us yet." Dean replied before he glanced at Sam and they both turned and got back into the car.

Heading back towards the haunted house Dean glanced over to Sam, who was sitting quietly in the passenger seat. "You ok Sammy?" It was silent for a moment before a quiet reply reached his ears. "Yea im fine, Dean." Dean studied his brother for a few more seconds before turning his full attention back to the road. If Sammy wanted to talk about whatever was bugging him he would, because after all he loved causing chick flick moments, no matter how uncomfortable they made Dean. In fact, if Dean had to guess, he'd say that Sammy loved causing chick flick moments just to make him squirm... of course he knew that Sammy was as cruel as that. He hoped.

As the silence stretched across the drive Sam was off in his own little world, thinking back to when Dean found out about Ruby. Ruby, the bitch that had caused so much trouble and heart ache between him and Dean. Ruby, who had lied to him, tricked him, strung him along...whichever term you want to choose. Sure she was dead now, he had killed her as soon as he figured out that killing Lillith was a major fuck up on his part, but the look in Deans eyes..when he had told Sam never to come back if he walked out that door.

****Flashback*******

They were standing in that damn motel room the he and Ruby had got, it had just been after he'd sent Ruby out before Dean tried to kill her. They began talking and Dean, poor dean he looked so confused, so hurt...and most of all... pissed. Very pissed. "Shes poisoned you sam!" "Look its not what you think" "Look what she did to you! I mean she up and vanishes for weeks at a time, leaves you cracking out for another hit!" "She was looking for lillith!" Dean sighed. "That is french for manipulating your ass ten ways from sunday!" "Your wrong dean!" Dean shook his head, his face and eyes actually reflected the hurt that he'd inflicted on Dean. "You are lieing to yourself" With two steps dean was up in his face as he continued "I just...want you to be Okay" Sam could hear the desperation in his tone, the hurt that was reflected on his face. Dean continued to stare into his eyes as he continued. "You would do the same for me, you know you would." Sam sighed, he didn't want to hurt Dean... he didn't want to cause the pain that he saw in his brothers face, in his posture. "Just listen" Pausing as he tossed the knife onto the bed before continuing. "Just listen for a second. We got a lead on a demon close to lilith come with us dean." God how he wanted Dean to come with him, he wanted his big brother with him...always. He was sure his tone reflected this, but didn't care. "We'll do this together." "That sounds great" Dean replied in a near whisper, but continued louder. "As long as its you and me. Demon bitch is a deal breaker, you kiss her ass goodbye and we can go right now." He wanted to agree, so bad but he needed her. She was teaching him, schooling him on ways to kill demons without having to risk Deans life. Looking towards the roof he took a breath. "I cant. Dean, I need her to help me kill lillith." Dean had turned away from him as soon as the words I cant came out of his mouth. "I know you cant wrap your head around it." He continued anyways, praying that Dean would see reason. "But maybe one day...you'll understand?" Deans head shook, only slightly but Sam saw it anyways... His heart broke a little.

"Im the only one who can do this, Dean." At this Dean turned around, anger being the strongest emotion expressed, along with the hurt. "No your not going to be the one to do this." "Right thats right I forgot, the angels think its you" He snapped, his anger getting the better of him. Why couldn't Dean just understand?! Deans eyebrows rose as his eyes narrowed "You dont think I can?" "No you cant." Ok so that was probably the wrong thing to say, defiantly considering how this just seemed to piss Dean off more. Yet he couldn't stop himself from continuing. "Your not strong enough." "And who the hell are you?" "Im being practical here, im doing what needs to be done." "Yea?! Your not going to do a single damn thing." Dean replied in the same tone he always used when giving orders. Sams anger spiked and he spat back "Stop bossing me around Dean!" Sucking in a deep breath he tried to reign in his anger. This was dean, his big brother... the guy he loved. He was just trying to protect him, but Sam was trying to protect Dean as well. "Look, my whole life" I've loved you. He thought. "You took the wheel, you called the shots and I trust you, because your my brother now im asking you for once, trust me!" God how he wanted Dean to accept, to trust him. To let him protect Dean for once.

Dean wasn't having it though, as his head began to shake. A sigh escaped Sam before Dean spoke. "No, you don't know what your doing sam." "Yes I do!" "Thats worse!" "Why? Look Im telling you -" "Because its not something your doing its what you are!" Dean shouted in rage. Hurt flitted across Sams face as his heart cracked more. "It means" But dean stopped. "What? No." Tears had already welled up in his eyes, blurring his vision and threatening to overflow. Dean swallowed heavily as he continued to stare at sam, his sammy."Say it." "It means your a monster" Sam nodded, looking away as his jaw clenched. He was trying to get a reign on his anger, but failed as his arm drew back before swinging forward, punching Dean right in the jaw. Dean who fell onto the ground from the force and shock of the attack, took a few moments to get up off the floor. When he did, his face was expressionless, just as it was when he took down...monsters. Sam felt his heart shatter in that moment. He snarled at Dean, he wasn't a monster! All of a sudden Dean lunged, his fist colliding with Sams face repeatedly, before he punched Sam in the stomach and then kneed him in the groin. If there was one thing Sam could say about his brother, it was that he was a skilled fighter. Of course, he wasn't thinking this at the time.

This continued for a few seconds before Sam got the upper hand, punching dean several times before he fell back against the glass. As he turned around he came at Sam again, who ducked and grabbed a hold of him. Shoving him throw the half wall in the cheap motel room. This time Dean stayed down, rolling onto his back and grunting in pain. He coughed and looked away from Sam, unaware that Sam had stalked towards him until he was on him. Large hands gripped his brothers throat as he started choking him, Dean tried to pry his brothers arms away sammy was to strong. Suddenly realizing what he was doing Sam released his brother and stumbled back. Oh god, Dean was right! He was a monster! Dean lay on the ground coughing, trying to get his breath back. "You don't know me. You never did" Sam said, anger lacing his voice. He couldn't let Dean know he was right, that he was a monster. "And you never will" He added, his voice carried the sadness that he felt. Heading towards the door he only paused at Deans words. "You walk out that door, don't you ever come back" Sam turned around and looked down at his brother, glaringly. Though his heart felt like it'd been shoved through a paper shredder and then ripped out of his chest a piece at a time. Sighing he turned around, opened the door and left.

********End flash back******

"Sammy?" Sam jumped at Deans voice and jerked up, looking at his brother. Blinking a few times he noticed they were at the house and Dean was leaning against Sams window. "Coming?" "Mm yea." Sam climbed out of the Impala and took the flash light and shotgun that Dean handed him. Reaching down he grabbed the gas as well and followed Dean into the woods, staring at his arse every chance he got. Dean was carrying the salt and the shovels as they walked in silence through the woods. It only took a few minutes before they came upon the graveyard and started looking for the right grave. "Found it!" Dean moved over to sam and set the salt down. "I'll dig, you keep watch." Sam nodded and adjusted his hold on the shot gun. Shining the flashlight on the grave while Dean shoved the shovel in and tossed the dirt aside. They stood like this for about a half hour before the ghost decided to make an appearance. As she appeared she threw Sam into a tree; causing the shotgun to fly from his hands and land a few feet away. "SAMMY!" Dean scrambled to climb out of the hole he had dug, determined to protect his baby brother. Sam groaned and looked around, trying to move from the tree but found he was forced there by the ghost, who turned to look at Dean just as he grabbed the shot gun and threw him across the clearing. "Dean!" Dean however hadn't dropped the gun when he crashed to the ground. Rolling onto his back he sat up, aimed and shot the bitch with the rock salt. After she disappeared he clambered to his feet and stumbled over to Sam. "You ok?" At the nod he handed the gun to his brother and grabbed the salt, gas and matches. Breaking open the coffin after a few more minutes of digging he doused it in salt and gas before climbing out and tossing in a match. The two stood there for a few minutes, watching as the flames consumed the grave. As they turned to leave Sams knees buckled and Dean reached out grabbing him before he hit the ground. Wrapping an arm around Sams waist he heaved him back onto his feet. "Easy there Sasquatch." He tried to sound teasing, but was actually rather concerned about his brother.

Supporting Sam they slowly made it back to the Impala where he leaned Sam on the car as he opened the door and pushed him into the passenger seat before doing a quick once over. His thumb traced the cut that was below Sams eye as his other checked sams ribs, frowning when Sam hissed. "Alright... I gotta check you over when we get back to the motel." Before he stood he watched his thumb trace down sams face and Sams eyes locked on his own, they stared at each other for several minutes...though it felt like hours before Dean leaned forward slightly and brushed his lips against Sams. They sat there frozen for a few minutes before dean pulled back and coughed. "Uh...yea...dunno what that was bout..." Placing his hands on the seat on either side of sam he pushed up to stand, only well he couldn't because his brother had grabbed his shirt and was pulling him back down and smashing his lips against deans. Deans eyes widened in shock, what the hell was sam doing?! Sure, Dean loved Sam in a way that wasn't brotherly, but could this mean that sam returned the feelings or was it just cause he thought dean would leave? After a few minutes Deans lips began to mirror sams, only breaking the kiss when he felt Sams tongue run across his bottom lip. "Sammy..." He allowed his eyes to scan over his brothers face, hand reaching up to caress his cheek. "We can't..." "Yea...right...your right. Lets just go." "Sammy.." "Can we go now dean?" "Yea, course." Dean stood and shut the passenger door before walking around the hood and sliding into the drivers seat.

The silence was an awkward one as they drove back to the motel, and continued after Dean got Sam inside and set him down on the bed. His hands quickly pulled his brothers shirt off, as gently as he could of course. Beneath the shirt was a large bruise covering sams back and his right side, Sam hissed as Dean gingerly pressed on the bruise. He frowned when he felt a crack but the rib wasn't misplaced. "Well your lucky it hasn't moved. I'ma wrap you and your gonna rest, ok?" His only reply was a grunt and Dean frowned more. Grabbing the wrap he began to work, soon his brother was covered in a white wrap, of course it'd been pulled tight but not to tight. Years of practice had taught him what was the right amount and what would only cause Sam pain. Pushing gently on Sams shoulder he got his brother to lay down after handing him two pain killers from the nightstand and a glass of water. He remained perched on the edge of the bed, watching as Sam started to drift asleep. A fond smile crossed his face as his hand reached up, brushing his brothers hair from his eyes. "I love you, Sammy." He whispered before leaning over and brushing a kiss to Sams forehead, lingering for a few minutes before he stood and laid down in his own bed.

A few hours later he woke to Sam crying out his name, quickly switching on the light he scrambled over to his brothers bed and placed his hand on Sams chest, using his free hand to brush the sweaty hair out of sams eyes. "Sammy, come on sammy wake up." "...Dea?" "Shh its ok." Sam had tears running down his face, a nightmare no doubt. Something that Sam hadn't had since they were kids. "Dean!" Sams arms wrapped around him, pulling Dean down to where he could reach him better, cling to him. At the hiss Dean pulled back. "Its ok, im here its ok." "It was..you..dea...you were...dea.." "Shhh its ok." He crawled into the bed beside his brother and pulled him against him. Making sure that Sam wasnt laying on the side with the broken rib. "I got ya. Shh I got you. I've always gotcha." Dean continued to hold sam, stroking his hair until he was sure Sammy was asleep. "I'll always have you." He whispered before drifting to sleep himself.


	3. Where I Belong

It was the next morning and Sam was the first to wake. The first thing he noticed, was that he was curled up against a warm body that in return, had their arms wrapped around him. Taking a breath he realized that this person smelled familiar, safe. Like gun powder, soap, oil, and... DEAN!? Jerking his head up he realized that yes, it was Dean holding him. Flickers of the night, the horrible nightmare he'd suffered. Dean had been murdered in front of him, ripped apart by a hell hound. Though it wasn't really a nightmare, more like a memory that haunted him at night. It was that night that Dean went to hell, the night his deal had come to a end. A deal he'd made to keep Sam alive. He remembered Dean waking him up, dean comforting him, and them both falling asleep curled up together. He tried to stay as still as he possibly could, resting his head back on deans chest. He was safe, he had always protected Sam. Hell, Sam couldn't remember another time he had ever felt as safe as he did when he was near Dean. He didn't really know why, and he didn't question it. Maybe it had to do with the fact that Dean raised him, or maybe because he loved dean.

However his inner dialog was interrupted when Dean stirred and his eyes opened, revealing the mesmerizing green eyes that were hid beneath the lids. "Sammy?" Dean thought for a minute, and then remembered climbing into Sams bed last night because of his distressed cries. "You ok?" At sams nod he sighed and relaxed some. He then noticed that he still had his arms wrapped around his little brother, and he grudgingly unwound them before glancing down at the top of Sams head; which was still resting on his chest. He could feel Sams arm draped across his stomach, tighten as he removed his arms and he sighed. "Come on, I dunno bout you but im hungry. Lets go see if we can find some decent grub." He watched as Sam rolled over, releasing his hold on him. Once he was free he slowly sat up, rubbing his face before he stood and strolled into the bathroom. "Your always hungry, Dea." He heard his brothers groggy reply. A chuckle escaped vocals and he shut the door behind him.

Sam shook his head as he pushed himself up from the bed and headed towards his bag, grabbing the pain killers along the way. Untwisting the bottle he popped two in his mouth and dry swallowed them before pulling out a clean shirt and jeans, along with clean boxers. He of course had to wait for Dean to get out of the bathroom but still he couldn't take that long now could he? An hour later it was apparent he could take that long. "Dean! Hurry up." He called, glaring at the locked bathroom door. Goddamn his brother for hogging all the hot water. "Im coming!" "I didnt ask about your sex life!" The door swung open to reveal Dean, water running down his toned chest with a towel slung low around his hips. "Happy, Samantha?" He grumbled as he walked past Sam; their shoulders brushing as he headed for his own bag. "Yes. Finally." Dean turned around and noticed the bulge in Sams boxers. Snickering he nodded towards it "So I see." Sam looked down and then at Dean an glared, before storming into the bathroom and slamming the door behind him. Leaving Dean to his quiet snickering while he got dressed.

A good while later, Sam emerged from the bathroom with the towel wrapped around his waist. He moved towards his bed and quickly got dressed, unaware of his brother staring at him from the make shift table near the small kitchen like area. After he got his boxers on Dean stood and walked towards him with the ace bandage wrap. "Come on Sam, I gotta re-wrap your ribs." "Mmk." He moved to the bed and sat down, with dean standing next to him. "So, while your ribs are healing I figure we can drift from town to town, i'll hustle to make us money and you can research hunts." Sam knew it wasn't a question, he knew that his brother was just looking out for him by avoiding hunts. But all the people, he took a breath about to argue with his brother when pain struck and he winced. Dean noticed this and grabbed his brother by the shoulders. "Sammy? You ok?" Sam nodded as he sat straight again to let Dean continue wrapping. "Yea... Made the mistake...of taking a ...deep breath." Dean nodded at this, but watched Sam closely while he finished wrapping his brothers ribs. Once he was finished he helped Sammy with his shirt, ignoring his brothers protests.

About ten minutes later they were heading out of the motel room and climbing into the Impala, with their bags in the back seat and Sams lap top open in his lap. Dean slid into the drivers seat and the car roared to life. "So, breakfast and then we're outta here?" Sam merely grunted in return and Dean smirked. His brother could be such a nerd at times. Reaching over he turned on the radio on and 'Dont fear the reaper' blared through the speakers as he put the car in reverse and backed out of the parking space before pulling out onto the road and putting the pedal to the metal.

Sam stared blankly at the screen, it seemed that a small town down in florida of all places was being terrorized by a vampire. A sigh escaped his lips as he shifted on the seat before the memory of Gordon coming after him, and dean wanting to risk his life came flooding back. It seemed that it was always Dean saving his ass, and when it had come time for him to save Deans, he had failed him.

********Flash Back******

"Sammy stay here." Dean said after turning and walking away from the windows, that had the mattresses leaned up against them. "What? Where you going now?" Hadn't Dean just come back from saying he couldn't find Gordon in everywhere he looked? This statement had made Sam pause in the process of stomping their phones into the ground so they couldn't be tracked. "I'm going after Gordon." Dean replied as he picked up a gun and some ammo. Of course, what good a gun would do against a vampire, was beyond Sam but whatever. "What?" Surely he had misheard his brother, because well not even Dean was that stupid. "You heard me." Ok so maybe he had heard him but that was just...stupid. "Not alone your not." He couldn't let Dean get killed because of him, to many people had died because of him and he wasn't sure he could survive if Dean wasn't around. "Sam, I don't need you to sign me a permission slip ok? Hes after you not me, and hes turbo charged. I want you to stay out of harms way." All of this was said while dean was cleaning and loading the gun with practiced precession. "I'll take care of it." "But dean you're not going by yourself. Your gonna get yourself killed." "Just another day at the office. Its a massively dangerous day at the office" "So what your the guy with nothing to lose now huh? Oh wait let me guess, its because uh because your already dead?" Sure Sam knew that was a low blow, but he had to get it through Deans head that even though the deal was almost up, that Sam was still fighting for him. Still trying to save him.

Dean looked up from what he was doing. "If the shoe fits." "You know what man im so sick of your stupid Kamikaze trip." "Woah Kamikaze? I'm more like a ninja." "Thats not funny." "Its a little funny." "No dean, its not." He knew by now his eyes had already begun to tear up, but he couldn't help it. His brother was sitting here, acting like nothing was wrong, like he wouldn't be going to hell if Sam failed him, like he didn't even care! But Sam, he knew better, he could see through his brother. Dean set the gun down and stood up. "What do you want me to do sam, huh? Sit around all day writing sad poems about how im going to die?" He paused to pick up a pad and pencil. "Lets see I got one, what rhymes with shut up sam?" "Dean" Sam snatched the pad from his brother and threw it to the floor. "Drop the attitude Dean. Quit turning everything into a punch line. And you know something else? Stop trying to act like your not afraid." "Im not." "Your lieing, and you may as well drop it because I can see right through you." "You have no idea what your talking about." Dean moved around him and sam spun to face him again. "Yea, I do. Your scared dean. Your scared because your year is running out and your still going to hell and your freaked." "And how do you know that?" "Because I KNOW YOU!" "Really?" "Yea, because i've been following you around my entire life. I mean i've been looking up to you since I was 4 dean, studying you, trying to be just like my big brother. So yea, I know you." Sam was aware that his eyes were basically over flowing with tears now, but he couldn't cry. Not yet, not with Dean finally looking like he was getting it, that he didn't have to hide his fears from Sam. "Better then anyone else in the entire world. And this, is exactly how you act when your terrified. And I mean, I cant blame you. Its just..." "What?" Dean had been studying the floor because it had become so interesting during sams little speech, however at the pause and the tone his brother had he looked up and noticed the tears in his eyes, how he seemed to be fighting them back. "Its just I wish you would drop the show and be my brother again. Cause... Just cause."

******End flashback********

It had been after that discussion that dean and him had finally started acting like brothers again. That was until Sam failed him, and Dean got drug to hell and used as the hell hounds chew toy. Sam glanced over at the drivers seat and smiled at the scene before him. Dean was relaxed as he drove, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel and he was singing along with 'wanted dead or alive'. Shaking his head he watching his brother for a few more seconds before Dean noticed he had come out of his own little zone. "Sammy! Come on sing along now! And I walk these streets, a loaded six string on my back  
I play for keeps, 'cause I might not make it back I been everywhere" "Oh yea" "and I'm standing tall I've seen a million faces an I've rocked them all" "I'm a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride I'm wanted(An: Both of them singing) WANTED dead or alive. Dead or alive Dead or alive Dead or alive" Dean smirked at his brother as they continued driving in silence.

About two hours later they pulled into a little town and Dean began to look for the local motel. Sam had shifted his position, where his feet were curled up under him and he was leaning his shoulder against the cars door. His head was cushioned on Deans jacket, he had drifted asleep after their little singing session. Dean honestly thought he looked like a tiger trying to curl up in a to small cage, but whatever floated his boat. Soon enough he pulled into the motels parking lot and parked, killing the engine and twisting in the driver seat as much as he could. Considering some time during the short drive through town, Sams feet had slid down the seat and were now resting in his lap. He sighed as he pondered on how to wake his darling little brother. He could either be cruel and scare him, payback for all the times Sam blared the horn when he was asleep. Or he could be the nice, sweet brother he usually was. With a huff he decided to be nice, considering Sam had broken ribs and all. However, when the ribs were healed it was game on!

He placed his hand on Sams leg and shook it a few times. "Hey, Sasquatch. Get up." When Sam didn't stir he huffed and shifted out from under his brothers feet, placing them back on the seat before reaching up and shaking his brother again. "Saaaaammmmyyyyy." Sam groaned and swatted at Deans hand. "Mmmmgoway" Dean smirked and chuckled at Sams immature behavior. Getting out of the car he walked to the office and got the room with two beds before he went back out and grabbed his and sams duffles, slinging them over his shoulder he walked around to the passenger door and opened it carefully, slipping one arm behind Sams back and the other under his legs he grunted. "God damn sammy you weigh a ton." Balancing Sam, the duffles and walking he made his way slowly to the room and opened the door with only his hand before gently laying his brother down on the bed and pulling the covers over him. He then dropped the two bags on the floor and collapsed onto the other bed. Not even bothering to get under the covers.

When he woke several hours later it was to hear the distressed calls of his brother again. Jerking awake he stumbled out of his bed and over to Sams, not even bothering with trying to wake him he just climbed into the bed and wrapped his arms around Sam. "Shhh its ok Sammy, I gotcha. Im here. Nothing bads gonna happen." He murmured into his brothers ear, his hand stroking Sams hair. He began rocking back and forth, pulling Sam closer to him. Soon he felt his brothers arms tighten around him in return and the sobbing slowed. "Dea?" "Shh I'm here." "Dea...it was...im sorry...my fault..." "Shhh Sammy nothing was your fault, nothings your fault." He continued to stroke his brothers hair and rock slightly. Soon Sams sobs stopped all together and only silent tears streamed down his face. "See? Its ok..." "Dea...It was horrible...the blood, it was you...they were killing you again. I cant lose you, I cant. Dea I...i cant...i need you..." Sams grip tightened on Dean and Dean kissed the top of his brothers head. "Shh, i'm not going anywhere." Sam shook his head but scooted closer to Dean, which dean didn't think was possible. "Love you, Dea." Dean sat stunned for a few seconds before sighing and settling back against the pillows, letting Sam rest his head on his chest again. "Love you too, Sammy." He whispered, doubting his brother heard him if he was even still awake.

Later that night Dean slipped out from beneath his brother and decided it was time to go hustle some pool so he could get some cash. He'd just changed and slid on his Jacket when he heard his brother stir. "iDea?/i" "Go back to sleep Sammy, i'ma just go get some cash." "IBe careful./i" "Aint I always?" He asked, turning and smirking at his brother. Sam rolled his eyes before relaxing back into the bed, burrowing his face into the spot where dean had been and in hailed. It pained Dean to see his brother crying, it felt like someone was twisting a dagger in his heart, very slowly.

Once he was sure his brother was asleep he walked over, stroked his brothers head once before placing a kiss on the top of it and turned to walk out of the motel room. Of course he'd checked the salt lines before he left, and secured the door. Walking down the street to the bar he was there for several hours, returning before dawn with over five hundred dollars in cash. He pushed the motel room opened and his gaze landed on the sleeping form of his brother. Smirking he walked over to his bed and collapsed ontop of it. It seemed like minutes later when he was woken by his brother, though the sun was bright through the window. The only relief from the glare was his brothers shadow, as Sam kneeled over him. "Sammy?" He noticed that Sam had tear tracks on his face, and they weren't the dried ones from earlier. No these, the tears were still streaming down his face. "Sammy come on whats wrong?" "I should have found a way to save you, Dea. I failed you, im sorry." Deans words choked at this and he threw his arms around his brother. Pulling him down against him. "You didn't fail me." "Yes I did." "No sammy, you didn't." As his brother nodded he growled, yes thats right growled. "Listen to me Sammy and listen well. You didn't fail me, it wasn't something you could control. Yes I went to hell, but not from a lack of you trying to get me out of it. And you know what? I'd gladly do it again! Its MY JOB to protect you, to take care of you. I couldn't live with you dead, I refused to. You said earlier that you need me, well damnit Sammy. I need you too. You're where I belong." "Love you Dea." "Yea...me too. Me too."


	4. Breathe In, Breathe Out

It had been four weeks since Sam broke his ribs, they were healing nicely, in fact if Dean had to guess he figured they'd almost be healed. He figured it'd be safe for them to start hunting again, you know easy things where Sam stood no chances of being thrown into walls or trees...or stuff. Ok so maybe very little chance, because lets face it. All of their hunts were dangerous.

Dean was the first one to wake, and as he crawled out from his bed he walked towards the bathroom. It seemed that Sammy had been having his nightmares less and less lately, while Dean was happy to some degree he also missed holding his brother. It was one of the few times he could get away with being mushy, just shrug it off as being worried about his brother. However as he shut the bathroom door and stripped down, getting into the shower his mind whirled. How could he feel like this about his brother? These thoughts they were wrong, no normal guy would want to fuck their brother on tons of flat surfaces they see in everyday life. Hell he had even wanted to fuck Sam up against a wall outside a bar before, because of Sam flirting with some chick.

Glancing down he noticed that he was hard and a groan escaped vocals. Well that was just great, a glance at the door and a pause as he listened told him Sam was still asleep. Reaching down he gripped his cock and began to stroke it. His free hand braced against the wall as he closed his eyes and continued to stroke, letting the warm water run over his body. In his mind he unwillingly began to picture that it wasn't his hand stroking himself, but Sams. Shaking his head he tried to picture anything but that, however as he ejaculated the image in his mind had been his brother with his lips wrapped around his dick. Well that just totally proved how fucked up he was.

Fifteen minutes later, washed and totally ashamed of himself, he exited the bathroom. A glance towards the bed told him that Sam was awake, mainly because his brother was sitting on the side of the bed using the heels of his hands to rub at his eyes. "Morning sammy." "Morning." Dean walked over to his duffle bag and quickly dressed before turning and walking over to the bed. Sitting down across from Sam. "You gonna live?" "Hm? Yea. Sorry bout last night." "Don't worry bout it." He shook his brother before standing and walking towards the door. "Ima go grab some grub. You take a shower and get dressed cause you stink, bitch." "Jerk" Dean could hear the smile even though he didn't see it. Smirking he walked out the door and slid into the Impalas seat and headed down the road to the diner he saw coming in. Might as well get some decent grub right?

Walking into the diner a few minutes later he approached the counter and leaned against it. Smirking when he noticed the waitress was checking him out as she approached. Hell he couldn't blame her, he was sexy after all. "Hey sugar, what can I get you?" He knew there was a chance she meant other then food, but shrugged it off. "Three sausage biscuits with 4 hash browns and a Caesar salad. To go." "Well someone has a healthy appetite, right away sugar." He resisted rolling his eyes while he waited for the food. After a few minutes she reemerged with his order. "3 sausage biscuits, 4 hash browns, and a Caesar salad. All for you?" "Thanks." He said, paying for the food. "And no, its for me and my brother." Oh how tempting it was to say boyfriend, but then he'd have to explain that to sam and well that'd just be all kinds of awkward. Picking up the food he turned and walked back to the impala before driving back to the motel.

Pushing the door open he dumped the food onto the table and glanced around the room. Noticing Sam walking out of the bathroom dressed, with a toothbrush in hand. Dean raised an eye brow and shook his head. "Breakfast is served. I got you the rabbit food you like." He said, holding up the salad. Sam grinned at him as he glanced at the toothbrush in his hand "What? I hate morning breath." "Uh huh, and ya couldn't wait for breakfast? I dunno if salad tastes like ass after brushing your teeth...come to think of it, i'm not sure if it never doesn't taste like ass." Sam simply rolled his eyes at his brother and turned to walk back into the bathroom. Only to re-emerge a few minutes later and sat down at the table across from dean. Dean of course had already begun helping himself to his food, making sure to push the 'rabbit food' far away from his precious meat. "Ya know, it wouldn't kill you to eat meat every now and then." He said, after swallowing down another bite. "Oh yes, clogged arteries is totally the way I wanna die. No thanks." Dean scoffed "Come on, one bite. It won't kill you. I swear, and if it does i'll bring ya back to life so you can kill me." Sam stared at dean, who was holding out his already half eaten sausage biscuit. "Fine." He reached out and took the offending item that was offered and took a bite, before thrusting it back at his brother and forced himself to chew and swallow. "Happy?" Dean took the sausage biscuit and took a bite all while watching Sams face as he chewed. When he spoke he couldn't help it, he burst out laughing. "Sammy, what did the biscuit ever do to you? You looked like it had offended you some how." Sam put on his famous pouty face. "It looked at me funny." This of course only caused Dean to laugh harder, though he was trying to force himself to stop. Sam after a few more minutes of pouting, also burst out laughing.

A short while later they were walking out to the Impala, Sam smirked as he looked at Dean, who was walking sort of ahead of him. Chuckling to himself, he thrust his arm out and lightly pushed Dean sideways, whom after catching himself from the stumble turned and pushed him lightly, sharing a smirk with him. He was glad that Sams ribs were almost healed, because well then for one he wouldn't have to worry about Sam whenever he winced or gasped in pain. As much as he loved comforting sam, it pained him physically when his baby brother was in pain, be it from a nightmare or from anything really. However now, seeing him smiling and goofing around, it reminded him why he loved him. His smile, well it could light up a room. Not really, but still.

Sliding into the impala Dean glanced at Sam. "Ready to get the hell out of dodge?" "Yea." They had been staying in the motel for a week or so, and he was going stir crazy. Which probably meant sir paces a lot, was going stir crazy as well. Putting the car in reverse he pulled out of his parking spot, before pulling out of the parking lot. They had already checked out earlier in the day, well really after breakfast that was. At least this motel he didn't have to carry sam in, he still remembered the odd looks he got when he carried his injured brother into that first one. Of course, anyone would think it odd to see a guy carrying a 6'4 guy who was passed out.

Five hours into the drive, he could tell that Sam was getting well...restless. Mainly because his leg was bouncing in this annoying fashion that he always did, however he had yet to make any noise. No instead he was staring out the window, as per usual. Dean sighed lowly as he shifted about in the seat, his movement grabbing Sams attention. "Want me to drive?" Dean shook his head "Nah, i'ma stop at a motel in the next town." The only response he got was a grunt, and Sam went back to staring out the window. The silence stretched between them as they drove, Dean glancing towards Sam every now and then. After a few more minutes they pulled into another motel parking lot and Dean put the car in park, in one of the parking spaces. Sam went to get out of the car but was stopped as Dean grasped his arm. "Dean?" After a few seconds he shook his head and got out of the car, followed by Sam who was gazing at him questioningly.

They walked into the office together, bumping each other lightly as they walked. Dean held the door open and Sam walked In ahead, chuckling at Deans face because of the last shove he'd received had caused him to almost do a face plant. "I'll get you back for that, Sammy." "Sure sure." The person at the desk gave them a odd look, but seemed to eye sam up. Dean growled lowly under his breath at the dude, shifting closer to Sam. "Can I help you?" "Yea, checking in." "King sized bed or two queens?" "two queens." The dude frowned "Figures" He muttered under his breath and dean smirked however Sam frowned. The dude handed him the key "Room 12A" Nodding Dean turned and headed towards the door. Sam nodded and followed Dean out of the office, heading to the impala and grabbed his duffle bag. Dean grabbed his own and after glancing at Sam he lead the way to the room, unlocking the door and pushing it open. However what was revealed was...disturbing to say the least. Bright red walls and a burgundy carpet, with heart shaped beds and little hearts everywhere. The two shared a glance before shrugging, they had seen worse in their life.

"Well at least it isn't that horrific disco room. Remember, it had the twirling disco ball attached to the roof?" Sam smirked and chuckled as he walked over to his bed, dropping the duffle on it. "God yea, I thought I was gonna have seizures cause of it." Dean returned his smirk, and mimicked him in dropping the bag onto his own bed. Dean glanced over to his brother and sighed softly. He allowed his gaze to run over his brothers body before snapping away just as Sam looked up. "So, sasquatch." He said in a teasing tone. "I was thinking, you could look for a EASY hunt for sometime next week. Figure your ribs are healed enough to start hunting again." Sam turned to look at him, with a look that clearly read 'easy?' "You're aware I broke my ribs on like, the easiest job ever. A ghost. Right?" Dean simply stared at him for a few minutes. "Yea well...avoid trees this time." "Sure dean, i'll ask the ghost to throw me into pillows." "Alright smartass." Dean smirked at his brother and walked over to him, pushing him backwards and causing him to fall onto the bed. Luckily the duffle bag had already been moved to the floor, or that coulda hurt. Dean collapsed onto the bed next to sam and quickly pinned him to the bed with his arms above his head. "So easily trapped." "Hm." Was all Sam said before he twisted his hips, wrapped his legs around his brother and pushed. Throwing Dean off balance and causing him to crash onto the bed, releasing Sams arms and sam rolled; pinning dean down. "Wouldn't bet on it." A smirk just planted itself on Deans face, had he taught Sammy nothing? See, Sam hadn't pinned his hands, and thus he struck. Fingers tickling his brother causing him to collapse onto the bed in a fits of gasping laughs. "Dea stop!" "What? Tickle you more? Mmk" He continued his torture until Sams face was red and he was clutching his sides. "You ok?" "Your...an...ass.." Dean frowned, he had caused Sams ribs to hurt. He went to move off the bed but couldn't, because Sam had grabbed his arm and refused to let go. "Sammy?" "But yes...i'm fine." Sam pulled on Deans arm until he laid back on the bed, Sam moved to lean over his brother, staring down at him for several minutes. "Sammy?" "Hm?" Dean blinked up at his brother.

After a few more seconds he slowly leaned up, pressing his lips against Sams. When sam didn't pull away right off rip his arms wrapped around Sams neck, pulling him closer. He wasn't aware when he'd begun running his tongue along Sams bottom lip, or when Sam opened his mouth but his tongue was now exploring sammys mouth and a low moan escaped him. That sound and that sound alone seemed to snap them out of it and they both pulled away. Sam rolled off of him and sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor and running a hand through his hair. "Sammy?" Dean could tell Sam was disgusted with himself, with dean and it was breaking his heart. Moving towards sam he attempted to touch him, but Sam flinched away. Sighing he dropped his hand. "Sammy, i'm sorry...i...shit, i'm sick." He shook his head, and glanced at Sam out of the corner of his eye. Sam huffed and stood up off the bed, moving towards his duffle bag. "I...I need to think." Dean shook his head, shoving off the bed and striding towards Sam. "No, don't leave me. Please. Sammy." Dean was aware that he probably sounded like a girl, but damnit he didn't think he could live through loosing Sam again. Not again. Reaching out he grabbed Sams shoulders ignoring the flinch. "Please. Sammy I Love you, and i'm sick I know. Hit me, punch me, stab me I don't fucking care but i'm begging here. PLEASE dont leave me. I...I cant..." "Cant what dean?" Sam was staring at him now, looking at the broken expression on his brothers face. "I...I don't think... please don't leave me Sammy. I need you, don't leave me...please don't leave me." Sam watched as whatever resolve dean had snapped and tears started streaming down his face. The grip on his shoulders grew painful but he ignored it, wrapping his arms around Dean and crushing him against his chest. "I'm not going anywhere." "Please dont leave me." "I'm not. Dea..." Sam forced Dean to look him in his eyes. "If your sick, then so am I because I want you... I'm not going anywhere." Dean looked at him for a few minutes before nodding, to shocked that Sam felt the same way he did to say anything. Sam smiled sadly down at Dean, before pulling him against him again. He ignored deans pathetic attempts to wriggle away, because they both knew if he wanted to get away he could. After a few more struggles he stopped and embraced his brother as well. He felt better, hearing sams promise not to leave him. Of course, he himself, had broken that promise before.

*****Deans Flashback******

They had just killed the whore of Babylon, well really he had. After loading Cas and the priest into the back of the impala sam looked at him. "Dean, you're not planning on doing anything stupid are you?" "Like what sam?" "Like michael stupid." "No sam." And then he slid into the impalas driver seat, waiting for Sammy before putting it in reverse and pulling out of the parking lot, heading back to their motel room. Cas was resting peacefully on the bed...well really he was sure that Cas was in pain, but the angel wasn't complaining. Sam was patching up the priest and Dean headed over there. "You ok?" Expecting the dude to give the usual answer anyone gives when asked, yes. "No." He did a double take and nodded, glanced towards sammy. Sorry sammy. He then headed for the door. "Dean where you going?" "I'm just gonna get some fresh bandages from the trunk." It hurt him more that Sam just nodded and went back to dressing the wound. Shutting the door behind him he climbed into the Impala and started it. Glancing back to see Sam running after him before grabbing his hair In frustraion, the look on his face so pained and...betrayed. Dean didn't know why that one glance caused him to gasp in pain, forced him to pull over onto to the side of the road once out of sight. Why he fought with himself, resisted the urge to go back to his brother. He didn't know why it felt like someone was trying to rip his heart out of his chest. But he had to do this, he had to keep his sammy protected, safe. It was better this way.

****End flashback******

He looked up into Sams eyes before glancing away. "I'm sorry." "Sorry? Why are you sorry?" "For before...when I lied to you...when I left you... I saw you, you know? It nearly broke me, the look in that rear view mirror. But I had to do that...i had to, for you...me...hell the world." "I understand, and you're here now. Thats all that matters." "Yea, and i'm not going anywhere." Because to be truthful, he needed Sammy to breathe.


	5. O' Death

Sam had managed to find a hunt, be it boring and so fucking easy it was unreal. But he knew that Dean, being the over protective guy that he was, wouldn't allow him to do anything else. Sheila Long had been raped and murdered, dumped out in the woods in the middle of no where and her body had not found for a week. Sam felt sorry for her, no one should have to die like that. Alone, and in pain. Her murderers had never been caught, and now her ghost was killing hikers. Sam was currently laid out on the bed in their motel room, one of his arms thrown over his eyes. Dean was out talking to Sheilas family, and Sam was taking a break from research. He hadn't really turned up anything, except for the fact that she'd been raped, tortured and murdered. A sigh escaped his vocals as he ran his hand over his face before sitting up like a bullet.

He had to get a hold of Dean, if he didn't get back in like an hour. Yea he could wait that long right? Another sigh escaped him as he pushed up off the bed and stalked around the room, as dean would say like a caged tiger. Strolling over to his laptop that was perched upon the dining room table, he sat down in the chair and began searching for more information, anything really on Sheilas death. Next to his computer was a cup of coffee, that he reached over and grabbed every few minutes to take a sip of as it cooled. After awhile it was actually cold, and left ignored on the table as he stared at a picture of Sheila, why anyone would want to murder such a sweet looking girl was beyond him. But then again, dean always said demons he got, humans were just fucking insane and he was beginning to agree.

A half an hour later he heard the familiar rumble of the Impala pulling into the parking space outside their motel room. Though he was itching to go out and see dean he forced himself to remain seated, hands gripping the table until he heard the keys in the door and then the door opened. Revealing a haggard Dean, who walked in and slammed the door behind him. "Its official, I hate emotional women." Dean complained as he dropped the keys on his night stand and turned to face his brother, noticing the picture up on the laptop and Sams expression. "Whats up sammy?" He asked, walking towards Sam.

Sam frowned at dean, and twisted around in his seat "I found out how she died...its horrible dean. How can people be so cruel?" He was completely confused about this. "Dunno sammy, like I said...demons I get. Humans are just crazy." Sam was forced to agree in this case, not even demons would go this far. "They raped and tortured her, before murdering her." Sam whispered, pulling up the news paper clipping about them finding her dead body. "Thats some sick shit...did they ever find the people responsible?" Dean asked, looking down at Sam. Sams head shook as he glanced up "No..." Was whispered as he leaned back and allowed dean to sort of shelter him from where he was leaning over him; because sam had slid down some in the seat while waiting.

Dean looked down at his brother, he knew he needed some physical comfort and so he allowed his arm to slip from where he had it on the back of the chair to wrap around sams chest. "I found where shes buried. We can at least put her to rest eh? Keep her from hurting innocent people." Sam merely nodded and dean knew that he wanted to get vengeance for this girl. "We'll go out to her grave tonight, for now lets... go get some lunch?" Dean asked, rubbing his hand over sams chest as he moved to stand up. However his progress was halted when Sam grabbed his arm. "Not hungry...can we just..." Sam trailed off what he was gonna say and glanced down. "Yea sammy, come on." Dean pulled his brother up and lead him to the bed. Even if he wasn't the emotional touchy feely type, he knew what sam needed and right now he needed reassurance that Dean was there, and not going anywhere. Damnit dean would give him that too. So after pushing his brother down onto the bed and pulling his legs up, dean laid down on the other side and pulled sam over to him; wrapping his arms around his waist with sams head on his chest. "Thanks, Dean." Was all he heard as he smirked. It was so soft, that had he not been holding sam he probably woulda missed it. "I'd do anything for you, sammy." He whispered in reply, watching as sam cuddled up against him more, one of sams hands idly tracing patterns on his chest.

An hour or two after the sun went down, Dean peeled himself away from a slumbering Sam and quickly scribbled a note and laid It on the bed next to him before walking to the diner down the street to get them dinner. He was sure sam would be hungry, since they'd both skipped lunch. Pulling the door to the diner open he headed in, ordered their food and while he was sitting there waiting Cas appeared, causing dean to involuntarily jump. "Damnit Cas, wear a bell." The angel just tilted his head to this. "What now?" Dean hissed out, glaring at the angel as he settled himself on the stool next to dean. "Where is sam?" Castiel asked. Frowning dean raised a eyebrow. "Back at the motel, why?" He replied. Cas nodded at this, though he knew about Sam and deans feelings for each other he felt no sin in it. After them living through every thing they did, and all of the world being betrayed by god on the edge of the Apocalypse he believed they deserved whatever happiness they could find. "He was upset earlier when I stopped by, this case you are on has affected him greatly dean." Cas replied, turning to stare at the elder winchester. "Yes I know, I just spent the better part of the night with him...what those guys did to that girl...is wrong." Dean shot back. "No dean, I mean really affected him." "What do you mean?" Dean was now staring intently at the angel, trying to read between the lines. "That is for sam to tell you. Just know, that if you hurt him it will be me you have to answer to." Cas narrowed his gaze at the end, and dean shuddered. "Woah wait you know about...us?" Castiel nodded. "And you don't care?" This confused dean, he thought all angels believed incest was wrong, a sin. "No dean, because you and sam are my friends. I believe you deserve happiness wherever you can find it, considering the lives you live and what you've been through."

The waitress decided to walk up just then "Heres your order sweetie. Need anything else?" She asked, glancing between castiel and dean who were staring at each other. Dean glanced up and grabbed the bag. "No thats it thanks. Come on cas." He stood and walked towards the door, followed by castiel. Once outside dean smirked "And thanks...for being understanding, cas." Castiel simply nodded "I meant what I said dean, hurt him and answer to me." Castiel replied. "I understand...and I learned before not to piss off the nerd angels." Dean said, flinching at the memory of the beating castiel gave him when he thought dean was gonna say yes to michael.

They walked back to the motel room in silence after that, and dean lead the way into the room. After placing the food on the table he walked over to the bed, shaking sam gently. "Sammy, come on get up dude." "five..more...minutes." Sam grumbled, rolling away from his brother. This caused both dean and castiel to smirk, because it was usually sam who woke first. "Sammy, come on." Sam only rolled away again. Heaving a sigh dean leaned over and pressed his lips against sams, before moving to his throat and chest. Sam sighed and pushed blindly at dean. "Mmm stopit." He grumbled. Castiel decided now was the time to make his presence known to sam. "Samuel, wake up. Dean quit molesting your brother, I said I was ok with this...not that I want to see it." Cas said, a smirk in place. That worked, because sam shot up and pushed dean away from him. A bright blush coloring his face. "Castiel!" Moving off the bed he grabbed deans hand and dragged him to the table, his free hand rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Didn't dean tell you to wear a bell?" Sam asked, and dean snickered. "He came in with me, sam." Dean answered, sitting next to sam at the table while castiel leaned against the counter.

After eating dinner, which was a burger for dean, along with fries and a coke... sam had a salad, diet coke, and fries. Yes he was a odd one, but they didn't rub it in his face...often. They were now heading to the girls grave site to get this over with, Castiel had agreed to go with them and assist, since there was no god anymore he didn't have to answer to anyone...that and he had been exiled from heaven anyways. Bastards. Dean got the horseman, death to wack god since well he wasn't doing his job anyways so why still be 'alive'? As they pulled up to the graveyard, and climbed out Dean turned to sam. "I meant what I said, avoid trees or else. Got it sasquatch?" Dean warned, pointing at his still healing brother. "Yes dean." Sam grumbled, while castiel smirked at the two of them. Grabbing the shovel and gas container off the ground, castiel, dean, and sam all headed towards the grave. Castiel was apparently digging up the grave while dean and sam stood watch. Lucky him right? Dropping the container on the ground 'gently' and making sure it was upright before he started shoving the shovel into the dirt and making a neat little pile near by.

The body was almost dug up when the ghost made an appearance, pissed that someone was fucking with her grave she screamed in sams face before he blasted her with the shot gun; and in turn the rock salt. After she disappeared he turned towards dean, just in time to see her appear behind dean. "Dean! Down!" Dean dropped to the ground without hesitation and sam fired, another round through the ghost. It wasn't long before she reappeared, throwing sam off to the side and charging at dean. Sam lost his shot gun when he hit the ground, but luckily he missed any trees! Dean fired off another round into the bitch before turning to castiel. "Are you almost done?!" Castiel shoved down again and struck the coffin, breaking it open "Yea!" He replied, climbing out and dousing the grave in gas before throwing in the match. Sam rolled onto his stomach before getting his feet under him and standing, just in time to see sheila burst into flames as she had appeared before him again. "Sammy you ok!?" Dean called as he ran over. "Yea im ok, just winded is all." He replied. Dean ran his hands along sams sides before nodding and gathering up their things.

All three climbed into the impala and headed back to the motel, well sam and dean did. Castiel decided to angel out in the back seat...also known as disappeared. Once back at the motel dean and sam took their turns taking showers and dean checked his brother again, before they both climbed into the same bed with deans arms wrapped around sams waist and drifted off to sleep.


	6. Do You Hear The Banshees Wail?

The next morning Sam woke up, still wrapped up with his brother. Though their positions had shifted in the night, now instead of his back to Deans chest he was laying on his stomach, with one leg thrown over Deans leg and his head resting on Deans shoulder, though the only thing still the same were the strong arms wrapped around him. Sam was sure that his brother would tease him for this, but as he looked up he noticed at Dean was already awake, and those bright green eyes were staring down at him. There was a smile upon his lips before he leaned down and pressed them against Sams. "Morning Sammy." He murmured as he pulled back from the kiss. Sam smiled up at him "Morning." Dean let him lay there for a bit longer, because in all honestly he liked cuddling with his brother, of course if asked he'd totally deny it. No chick flick moments and all. About a half hour later they rolled out of bed. "I'm gonna take a shower, care to join me?" Sam asked, smirking at his brother. He knew Dean was never one to turn down a chance to fool around. It proved true too, because Dean nodded and followed Sam into the bathroom.

Sam turned and pulled Dean into the shower after he'd stepped in, pulling Dean against him and crushing their lips together. One of his hands were on Deans back, the other was roaming over deans body. Deans hands were in a similar position, that was until one reached down and grasped Sams dick. Sam gasped as Dean began stroking him, a low moan escaped his lips. Dean trailed kisses along his neck, and down his chest before sinking to his knees and taking him into his mouth. Normally he wouldn't go down on a guy, hell he'd never really thought about being with any guy until Sam. But of course, he would do anything for Sam. His tongue ran along the vein on the underside of his dick, and he hallowed out his cheeks, head bobbing. Sam groaned and his hips began to thrust, but Dean reached up and held him against the shower wall. "Dean..." He moaned, eyes closed and head tilted down. Dean looked up from his ministrations just as Sam opened his eyes. They were darker then before, hazed over with lust...and love? "Dean...im gonna." He warned, trying to pull Dean away, but dean pushed his hands away. That was all the warning Dean got before Sam exploded, of course he swallowed all of it he could before smoothly standing.

Sam glanced down at Deans still hardened prick and smirked, reaching down to grasp it, before he began stroking it. Dean moaned, leaning against Sam who was pressed against the wall. "God, Sammy." Dean braced himself against the wall, when he felt his brother shift and Sam sank to his knees taking Dean into his mouth. Dean gasped, hips thrusting forward even though he tried not to. Sam placed his hands on Deans hips, and began to bob his head, cheeks hallowing and tongue caressing his brothers dick, dipping into the slit every time he pulled back. "Mmm Sammy" Dean knew he was close, looking down at Sam, those lips wrapped around him it pushed him over the edge. "Sammy! Ima !" was all the warning Sam got before his prick began pulsing, releasing his load into sams mouth...who of course swallowed it all.

After washing off and slipping out of the shower, the two walked back into the room and getting dressed. Just as Dean was about to slip his shirt on he felt two arms wrap around his waist, pulling him back against Sams chest. "Sam. We need to start researching man." He groaned as he felt Sams lips traveling the side of his neck, his head tilting to one side to give his brother more access. "Mmmhm" Sam mumbled in reply, who would have known his little brother to be so...forward? Dean felt his eyes drifting closed as he pressed back against his brother, his hands roaming over Sams arms. Pulling away as his eyes opened he turned to face his brother. "Seriously dude." He huffed, and smirked at the pout Sam gave him. "Fine" Sam all but whined, pressing a chaste kiss against Deans lips before letting him pull away.

Sam planted himself at the table, pulling his laptop over and booting it up. Dean was going out to talk with the family, a old irish family oddly enough. They had recently moved here from Ireland, and thus it gave Sam a sort of...hunch as to what it might be, though he seriously hoped it wasnt. Digging through several false websites he finally found a legit site, about none other then Banshees... Sam blinked at the site, because it went against everything he'd ever heard bout Banshees, but whatever. Jotting down shit, and bookmarking the sites he closed the lap top and moved over to the bed, flopping back onto it. Flipping through the channels he settled on a music station, and folded his arms behind his head, letting his mind wander.

Ok so it was great...really great that his brother returned his feelings, but what if something spooked Dean? Would he call Sam a fucked up freak, more of a freak then they already knew him to be? Would he run? Sam honestly didn't think he could handle it, if his brother left him. Not again, to many times in his life had he seen those tail lights heading into the distance, without knowing if his brother would ever come back. Once was to much for him, and each time he thought about it he felt like his heart was being ripped out of his chest. He was unaware that tears were streaking down his face at the thought, nor how long he'd been lost in thought until he heard the familiar rumble of the Impala outside and sat up, looking out the window to see the darkness creeping across the land. Dean walked into the room with a large white paper bag in his hands, kicking the door shut he dropped the bag onto the table. "I got dinner!" Dean called, before turning and seeing Sam sitting there. The tear tracks were still wet, and one tear was still streaking down his brothers face. "Sammy! Whats wrong?" Dean asked as he quickly crossed the room and sank to his knees in front of Sam, his hand cupping his brothers face and thumb brushing away the tear. Sam blinked down at dean, a confused look crossing his face until he felt deans thumb wipe something away. "I'm fine...didn't even notice I was crying. I was just lost in thought man." Sam chuckled, and pressed a chaste kiss to deans lips. It always warmed his heart, how quickly Dean would drop everything and anything if he was upset.

Dean studied his brother for a few minutes, returning the kiss of course before nodding. "If your sure." He mumbled, not really a big fan of chick flick moments, which he was sure this would turn into if he pressed it. "Lets eat, im starving man." He easily got to his feet, grabbing Sams hand and pulling him to his feet before moving to the table and placing their dinners in front of each of them. His dinner was a double hamburger with everything on it, fries, a beer and of course a slice of blueberry pie. Sam smirked as he saw this, before looking at his own dinner, a salad with french dressing on the side, a diet coke and sun crisp chips, as well as a slice of strawberry pie. "Man, your eating habits are going to kill you someday." Sam joked, though he knew it was likely to happen. Dean rolled his eyes at his brother before digging in. Sam also began to eat, opening the salad and pouring on the dressing before he began to eat it. "So, what did you find?" Dean asked around a mouthful of half chewed hamburger. Sam made a face at him "Thats disgusting man." Shoving a napkin at his brothers mouth he shook his head. "Anyways, it turns out that Banshees are a type of fairy...according to this site. They are a warning to the family of someone whos about to die, but they only warn a family thats either Irish or Scottish. Anyways, they can appear as a grey, hooded cloak or the winding sheet or grave robe of the unshriven dead. She may also appear as a washer-woman, and is seen apparently washing the blood stained clothes of those who are about to die. " Sam said, taking another bite of his salad. "Ok so...how do we kill it?" Dean asked. Sam took another bite, and a sip of his coke. "Well...you can't really kill it, It'll only go away if the person dies or they're no longer in danger of dieing." Sam replied.

Deans face screwed up "Well how the hell do you stop someone from dieing?" He asked. Sam shrugged "Well, we gotta find out who in the Harrigan family its targeting...or well offering a warning about. Then we find out if they're sick or if someones just out to get them." Sam replied. "Easier said then done." Dean grumped, balling up his hamburgers paper and starting on the fries. "So true." Sam sighed. So freaking true.


	7. Caledonia

Sam and Dean sat in silence, finishing their dinner before curling up on the queen sized bed they'd gotten in the motel room. Dean was currently watching tv, resting against the wall with the pillows behind his lower back. Sam was curled up next to him, his head resting on Deans chest while he too watched the tv, though he really wasn't interested in it. They'd head out in a few hours, to watch over the Harrigans house and see if the Banshee came around that night. But for now were enjoying in each others arms. Dean was watching some stupid tv show, Smallville or something. Totally lame if you asked him, it honestly ruined Superman in his Opinion.

No, Sams mind was thinking about the job tonight, sure the Banshees never killed the family, but what if it saw them as a threat and killed them? No one had ever had that problem before, but then again they did have rather bad luck. God he hoped their luck wasn't that fucking bad... Now that he thought about it, could a banshee even kill anyone? Hell if he knew, and he would dread to find out the hard way. Sam glanced up from his musings and looked up at Dean, who noticed to motion and looked down at Sam. Dean smirked before shifting and pulling his brother closer to him. Who would have figured Dean for the type to 'cuddle' not that sam was complaining, of course. "You alright there, Sasquatch?" Dean asked, his fingers idly running along the base of sams neck. "Hm?" Was sams brilliant reply. Dean smirked at this, his chest shaking at a suppressed chuckle. "So articulate college boy." Dean snickered "You zoned out for awhile there man. You ok?" He asked, concern leaking into his voice. Sam nodded against Deans chest. "Yea, just thinking." He replied. "Well be careful, that could be dangerous." Dean said, a smirk in place. "Haha." Sam grumped, lightly smacking his brother in the stomach. "Ow! So violent man." Dean grumped, rubbing the spot where Sam had hit him with the hand not currently stroking his brothers neck. "Aw, did I hurt you?" Sam asked, sarcasm thick in his tone. Dean nodded. "Should I kiss it and make it better?" Sam asked, not waiting for a reply before pressing a kiss against his brothers chest. In the spot where he'd hit him. He glanced up, before moving and kissing Deans chest three more times before taking on of Deans nipples in his mouth. Sucking on it before lightly biting it, smirking at the groan it extracted from his older brother. "Sam..." Sam however, ignored him and turned his attention to the other nipple, his hands moving across his brothers stomach and down to the jeans waistband. Brushing his fingers along the skin just above them he leaned up, pressing his lips against his brothers neck. "Dea..." Sam made sure that his breath caressed his brothers ear, before sucking on his neck, placing little nips and kisses as well.

Dean knew now wasn't the best time to get this started, because well why would he want to leave the bed if he had a naked sam in it? Knowing he needed to get sam to stop, was easier said then done. He moaned and arched into his brothers touch, head tilting to the side as Sam kissed, nipped, and sucked on his throat. "God...Sammy." He moaned, his hips bucking upwards. "Sam...we need to stop man." Sam however continued his task. Deciding he'd better take a more...forward approach he reached down and pulled Sams mouth to his, plunging his tongue into sams mouth and caressing every inch he could. Shifting them around so that Sam was on the bed, and he was on top. His hands wandered down, grasping Sams wrists and pulling them up above Sams head. Breaking from the kiss, he moved down Sams neck. "Sammy...I really...really want you." He said between kisses. "God Dea.." Sam groaned. "As much as i'd love to stay here, and fuck you into the mattress we have a job to do baby." Dean pulled back to gauge his brothers look. Sam had his bitch face on, with a touch of puppy dog eyes. "Later baby, I promise..." Dean swore, pressing a chaste kiss to Sams pouty lips. "SO not fair man...you better keep to your promise." Sam grumbled, sitting up when Dean rolled off him.

Dean leaned over and kissed him again, taking advantage when Sams mouth opened to plunge his tongue in. After several minutes he pulled back. "I give you my word." Dean replied, breathlessly. He and Sam both knew, that you're only as good as your word. Without it you weren't worth shit. Oh sure, you could promise someone the world but promises, were meant to be broken. He knew that by giving his word, Sam would know he'd keep to it. Sam stared into his eyes for a few seconds before grinning at him and nodding. Dean knew that Sam believed him, like he was suppose to. Releasing a sigh, dean stood from the bed. "We should get ready man." He said, looking down at Sam. Sam nodded and he too stood from the bed, moving towards the table before plopping down in the chair. His laptop was on the table in front of him, and it was open to banshee sites. Reading through them again he didn't notice Dean coming over until he felt his brothers hands on his shoulders. Reaching one hand up he placed it on top of deans. "It'll be fine." Dean said, squeezing Sams shoulders slightly. Sam relaxed back into the chair, his head resting against deans stomach. A sigh escaped him, how Dean knew what he was thinking still baffled him, surely dean couldn't read minds could he? Nah. As if Dean knew what his brother was thinking he chuckled, and ran a hand through Sams hair. "I'm your big brother dude, I can read you like a open book. That and you think loud." He smirked. Sam rolled his eyes at this, but a faint smirk was on his lips. Dean always knew how to make him feel better.

They stayed like this for a few minutes before Dean squeezed Sams shoulders again. "Come on man." He pulled away and headed towards the door. Sam lingered for a minute before standing and striding out to the impala after his brother, sliding into the passenger seat. Dean turned on the car, and Metallica blared from the speakers. It didn't take long before they arrived at the Harrigans house, and were parked just outside of it. Sam knew it was going to be a long night, and so he settled into a comfortable position. Angled away from dean, not that he wanted to avoid his brother but if he was touching him the temptation would become to much, and they were on a job after all. His head was resting against the window, his hand propped under his chin. Dean was in a similar position, and both were staring at the house.

Several hours later they heard the horrible wail that was the banshee. Dean was half way asleep, his head resting against the glass. It was sams shift, and he jerked in the seat, glancing around to see the Banshee heading into the house. Glancing at Dean he smiled slightly, before bolting out of the car after shaking Dean awake. "Come on man." He grumbled, and bolted up the house steps. Dean woke with a start as he was shook, and blinked sleepily. "Hmm?" he groaned, noticing Sam was gone. "Sammy?" Looking towards the house he caught sight of sam just as he went inside. "Shit." Dean scrambled out the the impala and bolted up the stairs just to see the Banshee throw his brother across the room, into the wall. The sickening crack that was heard seemed to echo in his ears. "Sammy!" He didn't know if it'd work, but he pulled the shotgun in his hand up and fired, hitting the bitch with rock salt. The banshee wailed and disappeared. Odd. He doubted she was gone for good, but it'd give him time to get sam out of there. Running over he dropped to his knees beside Sam and pulled him towards him. "Sammy?" He asked, running his hands over sam to check for breaks. "Mmm Dea?" Sam mumbled. "What have I told you about flying lessons, Sammy?" Dean asked, a forced laugh escaping him as he continued examining his brother the best he could. "Mmm To avoid flying lessons." Sam replied, leaning against Dean as he was lifted from the floor. "Thats right baby. Come on we're getting out of here. I'll come back later and deal with it. We know who its warning about now though." Dean said as he lifted his over sized brother up. The banshee had gone to the room of little Lilly Harrigan, so they assumed that was whom was in danger. Dean rushed Sam down to the impala and slid him into the back seat, before sliding into the drivers seat and heading back to the motel.

It didn't take long, before he had kicked open the door and set Sam down on the bed. Pulling his brothers shirt off he allowed his hands to roam up his brothers stomach, over his ribs and down each arm before moving down his legs. Of course he was checking for breaks, and let out a breathy sigh when he didn't feel any. "Damnit Sam." Dean grumbled, looking down at Sam who'd passed out as soon as he hit the mattress. Pulling Sam under the blankets after stripping him down to his boxers, tucking the covers around him. He quickly scribbled a note and placed it on the nightstand where he was sure Sam would find it. Before heading out to take care of that bitch.


End file.
